9 Months one week our sweet baby N was in our care full time. We had the joy of moving his mama into a new place and to welcome them back together as a family. I have a hard time sitting here and expressing my emotions and feelings that go behind it all. It truly has been amazing to see the Lords timing in the whole process. It is a constant reminder to me that He has it all in His hands and He knows what is best, even when I don't understand it. God knew that this would be our first big goodbye and He knew what my family could handle. Thankfully He provides and this transition isn't like a normal foster care transition. A "normal" transition is one that the social worker picks up the child and brings them home and you don't get to see them again. Thankfully this one is much different. His mama has become a part of our family as has he so we are an open door for them always. He spends the night when she has to work, comes and plays when she needs a babysitter and a helping hand as a family is. So this goodbye was not goodbye, but just a transition into a new chapter of life. This picture is one I have waited 9 months to take.
The first night he was gone I couldn't help but worry. Just because the court system says you no longer are acting parent doesn't mean your heart doesn't worry as a mother should. I found myself laying in bed with tears down my face, praying for him and his mama, that he would know he is loved and that the family he as always called his own loves him deeply. This foster care life is one that is hard to understand, especially when you love so deeply. Our hearts aren't built to love as our own and to let go, but this journey isn't about me. Its about these children that just need to be loved and know that they are loved. So we will take the pain for them.
10 months ago when we started this journey I never thought the Lord would have brought us to this place. So many prayers were answered throughout the months. So much pain was experienced, but an equal amount of joy was there as well. One of the most amazing things that happened was exactly one day after moving Baby N into his new home with his mama I had the blessing of standing on stage with both of them at church telling a part of our story. Some stories are just meant to be told and I believe that this one is one of them. Last sunday was Orphan Sunday, it is a sunday to raise awareness about the orphans around our world. We told our story about how the Lord brought Rob and I on this journey and never expected it to take this turn. Baby N's mom even spoke out on the difference having a supportive family along side of her in this journey. Our heart for reunification was grown to the max. From the first moment of meeting his mom I knew why the Lord called us here. We had the blessing to share and encourage others to step up and fill in the gap of foster care. Here in this county I live in there are only 60 foster parents and over 300 kids in foster care. Out of those 60 there are only a handful that are in it truly for the families and the kiddos. Those numbers just kill my heart. My prayer is that families step up and realize the crisis that is in their back yard and realize that these sweet kiddos are worth the fight. I'm thankful now that we can tell our story, this story that isn't over yet and will be full of pain and bumps, but this one ended in reunification. I know not all of the foster kiddos that are in my home will end this way, but even for just this one family it was worth it. So now baby N's mom is excited to share our story as well. So for the 400,000 kids in our country in foster care we will share our story as often as we can.
